Celebrate being single (Image: Getty)
Single's survival guide for
Valentine's Dayby courtesy of Marilyn.ca
Relationship therapist Ashley Howe
shows us how to celebrate being single on Valentine's Day
Celebrate being single on
Valentine's Day
Valentines Day doesn't have to only be about romantic love, as that's only
one kind of love! You can send and feel love of all kinds on Valentines Day and
feel the benefits of LOVEing feelings even without being in a romantic
relationship! Remember we have ALL kinds of loving relationships!
5 tips to a LOVELY Valentines Day as a Single
Person
1. Put on some Love Goggles!
Start to notice all of the kinds of love you have in your life. You'll be
surprised where you will find it. Think about the love you have and feel for
your siblings, best friends, dog, the love you feel for your coworkers, the
child you babysit....Notice the love that exists in the world. People helping
strangers, the kind service person who made you smile...Love can be a state of
being. You either notice it all around you, or you focus on the ONE kind you
don't have (romantic love). If you are too busy focusing on romantic love, you
will be missing all of the amazing feelings of love that exist all around you,
everyday, if you are open to it and notice it. So, on Valentines Day walk around
with your love goggles on, looking for and noticing and FEELING all of the love
that exists around you all the time.
2. Why choose one Valentine when you can have many?!
One of the best ways to feel the love, is to give it! It feels good to be
loving and kind towards others, and in turn, the warm and fuzzy feelings you
have for yourself will skyrocket. Write Valentines cards for your best friend,
your mom/dad, your fave aunt etc. Say in your card..." I love you because...."
Tell them all of the things your are grateful for, how they've improved your
life, or what times you've loved sharing with them. This will be unexpected and
will make their Valentines Day memorable.
3. The grass isn't always greener in couple land!
Valentines Day alone, is better than Valentines Day in the wrong
relationship! An observation I have often made with my clients in therapy is
that there seems to be nothing more lonely, than feeling alone while IN a
relationship! Most of us can relate to that statement in some way through our
experiences. So, without feeling down about relationships as they can be
wonderful, DO think about how neither state- single or in a couple, is perfect.
Both have flaws, and both have advantages! Remember that those in relationships
are not necessarily so much happier than you are on Valentines Day, so be
grateful that you are not currently in that position. For instance, if you are
out with your friends, look around the restaurant and observe other couples, do
they look like they are in a movie, all googley-eyed, excited, and perfect? Some
will look that way, but others may not. Make guesses as to what you think is
going on in that relationship and how they are feeling...Then think about how
much fun you and your single mates are having! Think about the relationships
you've gotten out of that you are proud of, the bullets you've dodged etc...Make
light of how bad some of them may have been. Be grateful that you are not there,
or where you used to be, and that you have new choices and new people to meet as
a single person!
4. Be your OWN best Valentine!!
Good news- As a single person, your Valentines Day will look EXACTLY how
you want it to look! Be happy that you don't have to pretend to like the awful
valentines gift from the wrong person, or that you don't have to be disappointed
about how the day went or what your partner did or didn't do for you. YOU have
all of the control over how your day is going to go. YOU can make it great! So,
be your own best valentine! Pamper yourself in anyway you want! Watch 5 hours of
jersey shore while eating bad take out! Give yourself a facial while reading
gossip magazines, take a walk for as long as you'd like ! Get a massage or a
pedicure. Do all the things you'd like to do or have your partner do for you on
Valentines Day-only this time, you can be sure they happen!
5. Have a blast with your single MATES!
Remember, your friends can be your soulmates, too! No Date? No problem!
Grab your favourite single friends (there are more single folks in North America
now than married people!!! So, you should be able to find some single friends,
or even just one!), and plan the perfect night out. Take each other to dinner,
for a drink, host everyone at your house. Do a game around the table, where each
of you say two things you like, admire, appreciate about every friend at the
table. Or, go around the table and ask everyone to say one thing that is GREAT
about being single! For instance, you can be as selfish as you'd like, you get
to have the excitement of who is around the corner or if you meet someone you
like, you can actually date them, you get to have adventures and experiences you
may not be able to have as a person in a relationship (how many times have you
heard from your single friends "I live your life vicariously, my life is boring
and predictable). Or even throw an Anti-Valentines Day party if you want a
different and creative night, where you can't say the word date or love and
where you serve cookies in the shape of a heart with an x across it, or where
you talk only about the horrible experiences you've had dating or in
relationships etc.
Whatever it is, being in a relationship should have NO bearing on whether
or not you have fun on Valentine's Day!
Chief News Editor: Sol
Jose Vanzi
© Copyright, 2012 by PHILIPPINE HEADLINE
NEWS ONLINE
All rights reserved
PHILIPPINE HEADLINE NEWS
ONLINE [PHNO] WEBSITE
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
Follow us on Twitter: http://twitter.com/phnotweet
This is the PHILIPPINE HEADLINE NEWS ONLINE (PHNO) Mailing List.
To stop receiving our news items, please send a blank e-mail addressed to: phno-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com
Please visit our homepage at: http://www.newsflash.org/
(c) Copyright 2009. All rights reserved.
-------------------------------------------------------------
